The DAMTP

Since everything seems to be degenerating all too rapidly into holiday mood (giant Santas and huge batteries of lights and so forth have started appearing in my neighbourhood¹ … students are leaving early to go home for Thanksgiving…which is this Thursday, by the way), this year I’ve decided to give in rather than resist. So my first holiday act of the year was to let my class know this morning that I won’t hold a Wednesday class after all. They must agree to do the homework and other practice I assign, and to use that hour (when it comes) to curl up with and start a new novel of their choosing². My second holiday act is to get everyone singing. Yes. Singing.

What shall we sing?

Well, Oliver Rosten has written a song that’s quite appropriate, since it is related to physics and mathematics, in a way. It’s about an aspect of the Department of Applied Mathematics and Theoretical Physics at Cambridge, so I’ll be listening out for especially enthusiastic singing from you readers over there (you know who you are), ok?!

I’ll steal the words from his site by way of explanation, followed by the song itself. The tune should be familiar to many. Let me/him know what you think in the comments (be sure to close your office door the first time around until you get the rhythm right):

Perhaps it’s just me, and my extremely pedantic world view, but I’ve always found the acronym for Cambridge’s Department of Applied Mathematics and Theoretical Physics, DAMTP, rather annoying. First, because it’s unpronouncable, and secondly because it ends up being pronounced as DAMPT. But this would correspond to the Department of Applied Mathematics and Physics Theoretical, which is positively Gilbert & Sullivan-esque. Indeed, so much so, that it has inspired me to pen the following song.

The DAMTP

To be sung to the tune of Gilbert & Sullivan’s `I am a Very Model of a Modern Major General’.

When naming a department,
The shorthand’s not academical,
Particularly when the work
Is mostly theoretical;
Noble and Perspicuous,
Yet positively memorable,
And at the very least,
It should be certainly pronounceable.

When said out-loud,
It should inspire feelings operatical,
Befitting of a subject
Both applied and mathematical;
Noble and Perspicuous,
Yet positively memorable,
And at the very least,
It should be certainly pronounceable.

To start it’s clear that we should state
The matters operational,
Achieved in such a way that all
Agree is democratical.
The Department of Applied Mathematics,
That is surely optimal,
But looming right in front of us
Is something reprehensible!

For now we find we can’t proceed
In manner purely logical,
For if we do then what we have
Is not remotely lyrical;
Above all else we must avoid:
An acronym tongue-twistable,
The only way to end is therefore,
Physics, Theoretical.

-cvj

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1. This is pretty bad, but nowhere near as bad as the Macy’s in Santa Monica having Christmas trees up at the end of September!! I kid you not.[return]
2. I’ll be asking them to report on that (hear that, class!!?). [return]

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